ASSESSMENT RESULTS

You are
Over It & Everything

You’ve hit a point where everything feels exhausting.

The effort, the expectations, the energy it takes to stay connected—it all just feels like too much. You used to care. Maybe you cared a lot. But after years of giving, adapting, and trying to keep up, you’ve mentally checked out.

Now? You’d rather ghost the group chat than explain yourself. You avoid plans, dodge emotional labor, and have exactly zero interest in small talk, forced fun, or dealing with other people’s drama. It’s not that you don’t want connection—you’re just too drained to deal with it.

Then the self-talk kicks in:
"Why does everything feel like a chore?"
"Am I just bad at people?"
"Is this burnout, or have I actually become a hermit?"

Spoiler alert: You’re not broken—you’re tapped out. Your brain and nervous system are in self-protection mode, conserving energy because they’ve been stretched too thin for too long.

I got you. Read on, my sisterfriend.

Characteristics of the Over-It & Everything

You dodge plans because even “fun” things feel like work.
You feel disconnected but can’t seem to make yourself care.
You ghost messages because answering feels exhausting.
You assume any commitment = more effort than you have to give.
You secretly wonder if you’ll ever feel energized by people again.

How we got this way

Gen X and Elder Millennials were raised to push through, handle it ourselves, and not make a fuss. We grew up watching people grind through exhaustion, ignore their needs, and prioritize duty over joy.

Somewhere along the way, we were taught that rest had to be earned, fun was a luxury, and other people’s needs came first.

So we kept showing up, saying yes, and pushing through—until one day, we just hit a wall. Now, even the things that should be enjoyable feel like obligations, and the easiest (and least exhausting) option is to check out completely.

Why we are Too Old for this Shit

We’re tired. Not just physically tired, but soul-level, deep-in-our-bones exhausted.

And honestly? We’re too damn old for this sh*t.

We no longer have the time (or energy) for:

Saying yes out of guilt, obligation, or habit.
Forcing ourselves to be social when we’d rather be in sweatpants.
Over-explaining why we don’t want to go, help, or engage.
Pretending we’re fine when we’re actually just done with certain dynamics.
Feeling bad for needing space, quiet, and friendships that don’t drain us.

Here's the hard truth...

Pulling away doesn’t mean you’re broken or incapable of connection—it means you’re depleted.

And when you’ve spent years running on empty, disengaging feels like the only way to get a break.

But Here’s the Plot Twist:

You don’t have to stop saying no, needing space, or ignoring texts for a bit—you just have to stop checking out completely and calling it "inner peace."

Positive psychology (and, frankly, science) teaches us that burnout makes everything feel exhausting, even the things we actually enjoy.

Pulling away isn’t the problem—it’s what happens when you stay in hibernation mode so long that rejoining the world feels impossible. The goal isn’t to force yourself back into small talk and soul-draining group chats—it’s to figure out what actually refuels you and start there.

Life isn’t about faking enthusiasm or forcing connection just because you “should.” The peace you’re looking for? It doesn’t come from disappearing—it comes from finding the people, spaces, and experiences that don’t make you want to disappear in the first place.

How to start changing this today:

01. Small & Solid Step Forward

Do one small thing that reconnects you to joy

Right now, everything feels exhausting, so let’s keep it low effort, low stakes, and pressure-free. Instead of forcing yourself to be social again or diving back into obligations, start with something simple:

Text one person you actually like—without feeling the need to make plans.
Step outside, even for five minutes, just to remind yourself there’s a world beyond your couch.
Do something purely for fun, no productivity allowed. (Watch something ridiculous, doodle, dance in your kitchen—whatever feels light and easy.)

Why? Because reconnection doesn’t have to be all or nothing.

Science shows that even tiny moments of joy and interaction help reset your nervous system and shift you out of burnout mode.

You don’t have to dive back into the deep end—just dip a toe back in where it feels good. The rest will come.

FREE MINI-MOMENTS OF JOY PDF DOWNLOAD

02. Medium & Mighty Step Forward

Close the Stress Cycle

Right now, your brain and body are stuck in burnout mode. You’re not just tired—you’re done. And when stress doesn’t get processed all the way through, it lingers, leaving you in shutdown mode where even simple things feel overwhelming.

The fix? Closing the stress cycle.

According to research from the book Burnout by Emily and Amelia Nagoski, stress is a biological process—not just a mental one. If you don’t give your body a way to complete the stress response, it stays stuck in high alert, making everything feel exhausting.

So before you try to force yourself back into socializing, let’s help your nervous system reset. Pick one way to physically move stress out of your body:

Walk, stretch, dance, shake it out—anything that moves your body.
Have a big laugh (yes, really)—funny videos, dumb memes, whatever gets you to exhale.
Cry if you need to—tears are literally part of your body’s stress-release system.
Get a long, tight hug (20 seconds minimum!) to signal your nervous system to calm down.

Why this works:
Stress isn’t just in your head—it lives in your body. When you give it an exit, you signal to your nervous system that you’re safe, the danger has passed, and it’s okay to re-engage with life.

Before you reconnect with the world, help your body catch up. Once you stop carrying yesterday’s stress into today’s exhaustion, everything else gets easier.

FREE COMPLETE THE STRESS CYCLE CHEAT SHEET

_{FOR PEOPLE WHO WANT TO}

03. Get Shit Done!

No more waiting, wishing, or wondering if things will change.

If you are over your own bullshit, check out my Instructional Coaching with personalized support, science-backed tools, and a coach who gets it, to help you create the life you actually want.

CHECK OUT 1:1 COACHING WITH KIRA

Hi, I'm Kira

I’m a plus-size, neurospicy, no-BS, sweary Gen X podcaster & coach who thrives on big ideas, deep conversations, and a dash of ridiculousness.

My brain is a whirlwind of curiosity, connection, and creativity—sometimes chaotic, always passionate. I don’t do linear, I don’t do boring, and I definitely don’t do timelines (because life isn’t a checklist, and I’m on my own damn schedule).

Late Bloomer? Hell yes.

Found my life passion & purpose at 35
Started my podcast at 39
Led my first retreat at 40
Met my husband at 41, married him at 45
Got certified in positive psychology at 44
Hosted my 25th retreat at 50

Best part...I’m just getting started.

If you’re here, you’re probably looking for real talk about happiness, love, midlife, and building a life that actually feels good. That’s what I do—through coaching, community, and my podcasts. Because knowing what to do isn’t the same as actually doing it, and I’m here to help you bridge that gap.

Learn more about Kira

"Kira gave me the real talk I needed; she had me put on my big girl panties and take a good look at myself and what I wanted."

JEANNE
WI

You are Over It & Everything